What to do if there is a spark in the office? – Interesting facts about relationships in the workplace
For him it's the blonde sales intern who always says hello so nicely in the hallway, for her it's that undershirted delivery man with the prominent jawline. Most employees know that feeling that makes them feel a little happier going to the office every day. Whether it's the beginning of a harmless crush, a little flirtation or the great love of life: the workplace has become a serious dating site in Germany. You often sit in an office chair Office chair and comes closer to each other.
- For lovers of conclusions: thought games about the causes
- For lovers of things that can be counted: Statistics and trends
- Is a relationship with a work colleague generally permitted?
- For lovers of drama: possible consequences after the breakup
Year after year, opinion and market researchers release the latest figures on how many people have met, fallen in love or broken up at work. All it takes is a look at the surveys of the past few years to see that German offices are becoming increasingly important as dating sites. While the Germans used to be very skeptical about the topic of “love in the workplace” and quickly made tender feelings in the place of duty a taboo, German office buildings are now at least generally considered a place where you can keep an eye on your colleagues. The reasons for this rethinking are varied.
For lovers of conclusions: thought games about the causes
On the one hand, employees are spending more and more time in the office. While the end of work used to be sacred and the hammer was collectively dropped, today it is common practice to view the end of work as a recommendation rather than a law. On the one hand, the reasons can be attributed to the tougher labor market, the increased competition between employees, the fear of losing a job and, as a result, the slide into the precariat. The latter in particular is becoming increasingly widespread - paradoxically in a time of economic upswing - which, according to experts, is primarily due to well-known, so-called reality TV programs on private television.
Of course, there are also positive reasons to stay in the office longer than contractually agreed. Good order situation, seasonal peak times, one or two business matters close to the heart, promising promotions or commissions. Either way: working life is increasingly becoming the focus of the average employee's life. While ten or twenty years ago it was reserved for those in managerial positions to align their lives with high-paying service, today “professional flexibility” is also required for significantly lower-paying positions. This complete devotion to the job consequently changes the social life of the masses.
For lovers of things that can be counted: Statistics and trends
For a seventh of all employees, a committed relationship began at work, one in five has already fallen in love at work and over a third could at least theoretically imagine such a relationship. This is the conclusion reached by a study carried out by the company for social research and statistical analyzes “Forsa” on behalf of the business network “Xing”. According to the study, among all those who have ever fallen in love at work, 85 percent of them consider colleagues to be the most attractive relationship partners. “Only one in ten people has lost their heart to a superior or an employee.” According to Forsa, women fall in love with their boss more often than men do.
There is even a “hit list” of the departments. It shows very clearly that areas of activity in which action is taken are very popular. According to the survey results, the hottest people work in the following departments: production came in first place, sales came in second place, human resources came in third place, accounting came in fourth place and marketing and PR came last in the top 5.
The following sentence from the evaluation seems particularly interesting given that employees are spending more and more time in the office: “One in three of those surveyed supports the workplace as a place to find relationships because you rarely get to know people outside of it.” The representative studies in German-speaking countries also mention the biggest advantage of the office as a place to hook up: You already know your partner through your work and are therefore not buying a “pig in a poke”. This can also be interpreted as a logical consequence of dwindling free time: those who hardly have any time for their private life have to be “result-oriented” when it comes to love.
Is a relationship with a work colleague generally permitted?
Love in the office is also a private matter at work. This is good and bad news at the same time. Because on the one hand, that's the good news, no boss in the world can forbid his employees from falling in love. Although there are often so-called ethics guidelines or house rules that contain a corresponding paragraph, such rules are not legally binding. At the same time, this also means that private matters must remain private: Just as a possible argument with your best friend, the aftermath of a Father's Day meeting or a pet's injured ankle should not affect your work, your relationship with a colleague should not affect your daily activities either. So if you are in love with your colleague, it shouldn't be noticeable by the quality of your work. Love at work can also take place in secret.
WHAT SHOULD I CARE FOR IF I FALL IN LOVE AT WORK?
The boss can ask the newly in love couple to make their relationship public in front of their colleagues in order to keep the radio rumor-free and thus keep the working atmosphere positive. The superior may also ask the colleague couple to refrain from expressing love at work. If the relationship is official, it is advisable, for reasons of decency, to inform your superiors and, if necessary, your colleagues. Love in the workplace doesn’t have to remain a taboo topic.
WHAT IS THE LEGAL SITUATION OF LOVE AT WORK?
Here, too, common sense summarizes all the labor law rules: wild smooching after the conference is just as taboo as a quick number on the photocopier - and that also applies to all the other Hollywood clichés that the topic brings up. Likewise, temporary machos and models who see the office primarily as a courtship rather than a workplace should exercise restraint: criminal law also applies in the office. A report of sexual harassment is a real risk - not to mention the employment law consequences (warning, termination) of an amorous "misunderstanding". Experts across the board advise against flirting at the top level: In such a case, everyone involved has a fundamental suspicion that the lover is more interested in career advancement than in the person for whom he or she has feelings. It also becomes critical when tender feelings emerge in a trainer-trainee relationship: the trainer must never exploit his or her position.
HOW DO I AVOID TROUBLE AT WORK IF I'M IN LOVE WITH A COLLEAGUE?
In love with colleagues: But if everything is going well and the relationship at work does not stand in the way of productivity at work, there are also advantages if boyfriend and girlfriend work in the same office. Unlike most couples, couples of colleagues also see each other during working hours, usually have the same working hours and (professional) interests and naturally have more understanding of work-related behavior than couples who work in very different work situations. Partners who work together already know in their private lives how their partner reacts in this or that situation - for example, whether they can cope well with stress or whether they provide particularly loving support in such a situation. When it comes to vacationing together, the same applies to couples as it does to individuals: employees' vacation wishes must be taken into account as well as other social considerations - this is especially true for couples where children are involved. Love in the workplace: There is a lot to consider here. But with time you get there.
For lovers of drama: possible consequences after the breakup
Film connoisseurs know: life continues after the happy ending. Let's assume the following situation: The lovers found each other at work, masterfully rocked the tightrope between private concerns and professional interests, kept their private happiness private and all the while worked harmoniously and flawlessly side by side in favor of the interests of their employer... and then for some reason the separation occurs. While at the beginning of the young love it was exciting and exciting to get to the office as quickly as possible, the staff now has two colleagues on the team who would prefer not to come to work at all.
As easy as this logic is for outsiders to understand, this situation can be hell for the newly separated. In particularly bad cases, it can help to ask your boss to be transferred to another department. Of course, this only works for larger companies - after all, the transfer must be to an equivalent position. Not only the superiors have to give their blessing, but also the works council if necessary. As far as manners are concerned, it goes without saying that you should behave discreetly here too: loud arguments in the hallway as well as tearful whining should be avoided. If this principle is violated, the work suffers - and the superior must intervene.